22nd
Right Wing Glossary
American People, The: Citizens who believe in the same things as you. You and those who agree with you will be referred to as “The American People,” regardless of your actual percentage of the population. Citizens who do not believe in the same things will never be referred to as “The American People”, even if they vastly outnumber you. “The American People have spoken, and they think our health care system is just fine the way it is.”
Elite: Someone who is incapable of pretending to be as unintelligent and intellectually non-curious as you.
Family: Fundamentalist Christians. See Family Research Council, American Family Association.
Fascism: Being forced to help pay for the day to day operations of the United States of America, or “Taxes.”
Fraud: When someone votes for a political candidate whom you do not like.
Freedom: Things that you like. Used as justification for causes as varying as war (“A war for freedom,” “Our enemies hate our freedom,”) or continuing to allow insurance companies to engage in the arbitrary rejection of all of your medical bills (“We are against health care reform because we are for freedom.”) Groups with “Freedom” in the title (“Freedom Works,” “Freedom Forum”) are generally founded and funded by large, multi-national corporations who have a financial interest in maintaining the status quo.
Global Warming: The theory that the overall temperature of the earth is increasing due to the unprecedented use of fossil fuels and the emission of noxious and dangerous gasses that has occurred over the past 150 years. This theory is supported by the majority of researchers and scientists all over the globe, but is not to be believed based on a personal dislike of Al Gore.
Handouts: Government benefits for which you do not personally qualify.
Junk Lawsuits: Any lawsuit except the one that you are pursuing in court right now.
Liberal: A broad based, derogatory term that can be applied to anything or anyone that you don’t like. Politicians, civilians, teachers, reporters, newspapers, actors, athletes, countries, continents, etc.
Liberty: The right to be a fundamentalist Christian, and the right to attempt to make fundamentalist views mandatory through legislation and litigation. Many groups with “Liberty” in the title (Liberty University, Liberty Counsel) are generally opposed to letting other people (women, non-Christians, homosexuals) do what they want.
Mainstream Media: Any organization that delivers news that you do not like.
Patriot: Those who believe in the same things that you do.
Pork Barrel Spending: Government spending that happens in districts or states other than your own.
Race Card, The: When someone who you don’t like points out that you are behaving as if you do not like other races.
Radical: A person in public office who does not agree with your political or economic philosophy.
Small Government: Keeping the profit earning abilities of large corporations free from regulation or government interference. Keeping the government from interfering in the lives of American citizens, with exceptions for the following issues: abortion, birth control, homosexuality, sex education, stem cell research, euthanasia, drugs, alcohol, pornography, popular music, movies, the use of salty language or the display of nudity over the public airwaves, public displays of religions other than Christianity, speaking languages other than English, the mandatory recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance by children, the teaching of evolution in public schools and the burning of the American flag.
Thugs: Labor Unions
Traitors: Members of the opposition party when they are in the minority.
Tyrants: Members of the opposition party when they are in the majority.
